So Happy Together...

Jordany continues to grow like a weed. He's full of life and energy and only stops talking when he's asleep. He's a little sponge absorbing everything and anything around him...some good, some not so good (haha!).

He had a great summer. He had fun going to two different VBS programs. He went to a day camp called Barefoot Republic for two weeks and had a blast. He met new friends, went to basketball camp at the kid's high school and swam his little heart out...each day at the pool more courage and more progress toward learning to swim. Summer was full and good...and long...and filled with ice cream!

Kindergarten started this week for him, though. He had three half days and will start full time next week. It's been a while since my house was quiet! I stood and listened to the silence. We forget what silence "sounds" like. It's nice for me to have a break from the constant activity. Being a mom to 5 kids is so rewarding, but also very exhausting, not to mention being a 46 year old mom to a 5 year old! I get tired fast...much faster than when the 4 teens were little. I have to adjust and regroup and try to find some rest (and perspective) in between.

In some of that quiet time I remembered how smart 5 year olds are. Jordany needed to learn a 5 digit code to type in a keypad to buy his lunch at school. My skeptical side said, "there's no way he can learn this"... He learned it in under 10 minutes. He can punch it in himself and he can recite it at will. Amazing to me, but, then again, Jordany is always amazing me.

Sometimes I stare at him while he's playing, and I think I'm in a dream. Is he really here? How can I be a mom of a 5 year old? Have we actually started over? The answers are, of course, "yes", but the reality is that it's surreal. The process of bringing him home took so long. I sometimes just can't believe he's here in the flesh playing on my floor, making his cars jump and his "guys" talk...immersed in imagination and happy.

Like I said earlier, Jordany is a sponge. He hears EVERYTHING we say and some things we don't! Sometimes I think he's literally a mind reader. He's English is terrific. There are still times when it's hard to understand what he's saying. His sentence structure will be off or he will use the wrong pronoun for male or female, and he has some catching up to do, but, for the most part, he speaks well and clear.

He and I see an adoption therapist a few times a month. We do what's called "theraplay". Theraplay is actually learning to "play" with your child but with a purpose. It may be that Jordany needs to get out some angry energy. So, he may squish and scrunch sheets of tin foil together to make a ball which helps to release endorphins. Using large muscle groups is important, and we may do a three-legged race or play "Row, Row, Row You're Boat" on the floor, feet pressed together, hands locked and rocking back and forth. Other activities are calming...taking baby powder and a tiny paintbrush and "painting" the palm of his hand to uncover the unique lines that make up his hand or putting lotion on his skin encouraging soft and gentle touch. All of the activities are designed to help him learn to regulate...find an appropriate way to exert extra energy or an option for a calming down...to bring him back from going too far in one direction.

Interestingly, we all need regulation. Crushing up tin foil feels good. Pushing against an object with our feet helps release tension. Rubbing in lotion is calming. Painting with baby powder is soft and relaxing. Jordany thinks we are just having fun and playing...and we are...but we are also learning a lot about each other and are helping one another as we grow together. Theraplay is fun and challenging. It takes a lot of energy, but is important to Jordany's growth, and in the long run, it helps the whole family.

One thing Jordany loves to do is imitate...that's normal. Kids do that. It's different though with Jordany (at least in our family). He's 5, and we've only known him for a year and a half. He picks up everything we say and do. He is a constant observer. I have to be careful. Sometimes he will raise his voice to the dog when she's begging for food, and I realize he got that from me or he may say, "oh my gosh," which he picked up from the teens. We have to redirect him to "oh my goodness." Raising teens with a 5 year old opens doors that weren't challenging when the teens were young. What teens say and do isn't necessarily what you want your little one saying or doing...it's not age appropriate, but we didn't get the chance to start at the beginning with Jordany. So, we're watching what we say and do a lot more these days.

Regardless of the language challenges, the difficulties in teaching him what to say and what not to say, the tantrums over no more popsicles or losing the race, Jordany continues to evolve into a beautiful child. He's always been special. He's always been ours. We love him so dearly and our family wouldn't be complete without him. Thank God he's home and that seeing him playing on the floor is not a figment of my imagination. He's really here. He's really growing and changing and developing. It's a miracle. He's a miracle.

Despite some of the things that "we wish he didn't know or say," this miracle boy is tender and sweet, and he's learned plenty that we are proud of. The other day, he and I went to church, just the two of us. After service, we got in the car, and he said, "Thanks for taking me to church Mom." I then took him for a Sonic treat, and he said, "Thanks for the Sonic Mom." After breakfast, lunch and dinner he says, "Thank you for my breakfast (or whatever the meal) Mom." Thank you's go a long way, and every time he says "thank you", I take a deep breath and thank God. Saying "thank you" is underrated and underused. I cherish the words.

Jordany also opens doors for people, cleans his room when asked and loves to hug. He shakes people's hand when meeting them and on occasion will actually say, "Nice to meet you." He's funny too. Our bedtime routine is book, prayers and songs. The other night I went to put him to bed, and when it came time for songs, he said, while making an "O" with his fingers, "Zero songs mom." Haha! We skipped songs that night. Jordany is clever and fun, and I know God has a great future planned for him.

He may not know how much he's grown or how much he absorbs, but it doesn't go unnoticed. One of my favorite is when he throws his little brown arm around my waist and says, "So happy together." Yes, Jordany, we are indeed so happy together!